Hi, can I place a food order for delivery please?

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Life moves so fast for everyone these days I suppose, you don’t need an illness like MS to run you down. Life has a way of doing that for you. I’m trying to stop it but so far i’m just clinging on for dear like and hoping for the best!

Like yesterday, I was running around like I was superwoman as I had all the energy in the world and a million things that needed done, but boy i’m paying for it today.

I was up at 6, showered, dressed for work (hair washed, dried and straightened with make up on!) and breakfast all done for me and the kids to be leaving the house at 8am! This on its own is a HUGE task in itself.

All in the car, dropped my daughter off for breakfast club at her school, then me and little man back in the car to drop him at nursery. I then stopped at the shops for nappies and veg and was at work for 9am! Still feeling great at this point

Finished work at 2:45pm, back to collect my daughter from school, then off to collect little man from nursery, meeting my husband from work on the way home and 4 of us back in the house just before 4pm.

Quick tea was made for the kids (ham & cheese toasties with cucumber sticks.) My mam then came round as me and we were at our 3rd session of ‘making sense of MS’ so off out we go again. I’m the only one who drives so back in the car, i’m tired now and could do without going back out but it’s our last week so off we go.

The session was good, I enjoy spending the time just me and my husband out the house and able to have a conversation with each other. It was a question & answer session this week with a visit from the MS society too, there was also lots of information to take away to read later, some things I’d not even thought about either and some good ‘just incase’ stuff too. I was glad we went.

By the time we were finished and home it was after 7pm, and yes both kids were still awake (but thankfully at least clean and in pjs) We didn’t eat till late, and of course ordered a take away (no good for me at all!) We were both tired by now and ready for bed. Thankfully both kids sleep through most of the time so we at least had an undisturbed night.

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Not all my days are as mad as this, I only work 3 days a week and try to avoid any manic evening appointments, but it shows how easy it is for things to get too much too quickly for anyone.

Some things I have no control over,
• School/nursery run & work.
Then there is:
• Shopping/appointments and kids activities, these happen but are not as strict, I could always re arrange,  cancel or ask for help.
Then I have things like:
• Housework – washing clothes is a constant with kids, cooking – meals for kids, snacks and then an evening meal for us.
Then finally if there is anything left it’s spent on:
• Quality time with my husband – family time for us all or time to ourselves to recharge.

This is hard for anyone who works with a family, and would be hard regardless of MS I think. I’m just still trying to find a balance I suppose, my daughter is 5 and little man is 14 months, I’ve not long gone back to work from maternity leave too.

I find, I’m starting to have to make choices on where my energy goes. Usually the things I don’t have the energy for are the shopping and cooking. Asda on a Friday afternoon with a baby in tow is bad enough,  carrying the shopping up a flight of stairs at home is a nightmare.

The cooking is where I quit most of all, after a crazy day I can’t face making a meal at 8pm eating it, and then doing the dishes and tidying up before bed. I need to stop this as bad food = bad health & less energy and the whole cycle continues.

I need a good plan, the trouble is its 20 past 8 at night, the kids have just gone down (littlist put up a fight tonight) I’ve not made anything for tea yet and I don’t have enough energy to think straight let along make a plan today.

Maybe tomorrow. Or maybe not.

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What a week!

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Well Monday was my first day back to work after 14 months of maternity leave. It was so nice to be back and it was nice to be ‘me’ again for a few hours, I work in a small busy office with some lovely people and I’d forgotten how nice it can be to be working and not just a ‘mam’ at home and school.

Definite highlights of returning to work are drinking a cup of tea while it is hot,  going to the bathroom alone, chatting about things other than Dora the Explorer, being allowed to think my own thoughts for a bit without interruptions was lovely too, I had forgotten what it was like when my head wasn’t racing at 100 mph with the stress of home, work is just as busy but it’s a different kind and I feel more productive.

Not so good things were, my arm and wrist ached really bad from all the writing, typing and paperwork, I’ve had to take a lot.of pain killers to get me through this week, i’m hoping it’s just because I’m not used to it. The hour at the beginning and end of my work day which is spent dropping off and collecting the kids is ridiculous, I have to go miles out my was to drop the youngest off first, then come practically home to take the eldest to school and then head back the way I came to get to work. Finally I was surprised how exhausted I was by lunchtime on Wednesday,  I was actually watching the clock and could feel myself going slower and was ready to sleep. It’s a good job i’m part time and only work Monday – Wednesday or I’d have been in trouble.

Since I’m only at work the first half of the week I get to spend Thursday and Friday at home. My daughter has just started reception class so for the first time since he was born me and my little man get two whole days together. My daughter is loving ‘big school’ and is  thrilled to be staying for her lunch, she has a lot of friends and has settled in amazing, although she is exhausted by the end of the day. My little man didn’t really get a lot out of our two days together this week tho, he is full of cold so we mostly spend them in the house. Think I might try to find a play group on a Friday to take him to next week, there is a sure start centre close to us which has a sensory room he would love too. Feel a bit bad we don’t do a lot of these things, but over the 6 weeks we had to do things that were suitable for both kids ages, he will like some things just for him.

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It was also my wedding anniversary this week, me and my husband have been married for 2 years and I got the most beautiful card and flowers from him, they were gorgeous. We have been together for 12 years and got married after 10, he is my best friend and has been amazing this last year too 🙂

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Ok enough slushy stuff…… My next stress has began already! 

My a daughter is 5 next week and we have organised a disco for her, this was what she requested and honestly it has been a nightmare and cost a small fortune! The venue we had suddenly closed and when the brewery went in the person had taken the deposit and book showing we had paid for a party! After a lot of stress and phone calls we have a room and our deposit has been honoured. I just need to pay the remaining balance for the cake, confirm times with the princess who is making and appearance,  go in and decorate  the room and fill the party bags! Then at some point pay the dj, princess and venue for the food!

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NEVER AGAIN!

I’ve just gone back to work so money is tight as it is and I’ve had to pay the nursery £360 last week for my little man to attend 2 days a week.  We are officially skint now, oh dear, well I’m sure the kids will love it.

Went for a run last night,  didn’t do as good as I wanted and we walked half the way back. Think I was just so tired after this week,  they had just finished clearing up after the GNR and there was a few runners out, noticed how dark it is getting now on a night,  it was very blustery too – definitely autumn setting in. Might try to go again on Sunday night, will see how I feel.

Going to have some family time this weekend and then do it all again next week!

Life waits for no one

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Had the best conversation today, me and my husband were discussing mortgages, bills and boring things like that, then during this conversation we ended up making a decision to just carry on as normal. This got me thinking,  I have had such a strange year, my health being only one of the crazy things that gas gone on, and yet we carry on as normal.

I’m going back to work tomorrow after a long 14 months of maternity/holiday leave, I took the full entitlement to enable me to be a ‘stay at home mam’ for a year. My life has been all over the place this year tho, and to be honest it still is a bit, but tomorrow is a big day for us all. My daughter goes to reception class full days tomorrow(she is beyond excited to stay for school dinners),  my not so baby boy is starting nursery class for 2 days while I’m working. And yes i go back to the day job. I’ve now found myself in the familiar Sunday night routine.

•School back packed, uniform ready. •Nursery back packed, forms filled in and clothes laid out.
•Work clothes hanging up and lunch all sorted.
•Breakfast set up ready for in the morning,  alarms all set and yes everyone has been bathed!

Back to normal.

That’s what works best,  back to what is familiar,  what needs to be done and what we do as part of our normal lives. Because life waits for no one and if I don’t get back to normal I fear I may not be living it at all.

Nursery, Big school & Work

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The time is getting closer, my little man will be going to a nursery 2 days a week, when I go back to work from maternity leave in September.

I will have been off nearly 14 months when I go back as I had a months holiday added to the beginning and end of my 12 months leave. I’m looking forward to a change of routine and some adult conversation the most,  but im not looking forward to leaving the kids.

I am gutted he will be going, and know he will hate being left 😦 but I know he will love it once he settles in, he needs to play with other kids and will get so much from it. The biggest reason tho is I NEED to go back to work, maternity pay sucks and im amazed we have survived this long really.

He had a home visit today, this is where the nursery staff visit him in his own home environment to introduce themselves. I think it’s to have a nosey at your house really 🙂 he was a little shy at first but once they started playing with toys he was happy.

He is going in for a 2 hour visit on Thursday morning and im going to leave him 😦 i’m not looking forward to that! I’m sure I will be worse than him tho and once he starts to play (or its snack time) he will be fine.

I only work 3 days a week and the hours are not too long, so it shouldn’t be too bad, it’s not like he will be in for a really long day. Then once I have picked him and my daughter up we should be home for 4 pm at the latest, ready for tea and family time before bed.

My daughter went to nursery 3 days a week when she was younger, she is very happy and confident, although I think that’s in her nature. She will be starting reception class the week I start back at work and she is so excited.

With her being one of the oldest in the class, she has done 2 years on pre school nursery. She has been desperate to join the ‘big school’ and can’t wait to stay for dinners.

Where does the time go? It seems like not long ago I was returning to work after having my daughter and preparing for her first day at nursery.

So I’m going to enjoy the last week or so of the summer holidays with my 2 monsters before our routine changes ready for nursery, big school and work.

MS & being a Mam of 2

The most exhausting thing I deal with on a daily basis is without a doubt dressing and changing my one year old.

He is at that age where they fight you every step of the way, he will scream, kick, roll over, pull his clothes and nappy off and generally do everything is his power to escape from you. This usually results in some pretty interesting ways to get dressed, and no amount of toys or objects will keep him still now for a nappy change so the best plan I’ve found is to always just dive in and hope for the best, and keep telling yourself he will grow out of it.

All kids do this, my daughter who is nearly 5 went through this, I remember the desperate battle to change her clothes, fasten her coat and put her shoes on. It was a struggle back then but im finding it especially hard with my hand and arm as it is.

Things I struggle with now is my right arm and hand. My fingers don’t function and I have no grip, my wrist hurts and has no strength and my shoulder constantly aches. I find buttons and poppers difficult when the kids are still, having to hold a screaming, kicking child takes twice as long and causes a lot of pain in my arm.

My little boy has only just gone 1, I know this goes on of a while and is then replaced by other things:

● Going rigid when you try to strap them in the pushchair or car seat. 

● Flying legs when you try to put them in a highchair or shopping trolly.

● Going limp or lying on the floor refusing to move so you have to carry them. 

● Running away/having a tantrum so you have to carry them away.

● Being too tired to walk so needing to be carried.

All these things i’m sure I will find difficult when I come to do them second time round. There is 4 years between my daughter and son, and things just don’t work like they used to. Fastening my daughters buttons on her school cardigan, putting plaits in her hair and getting a zip fastened are really hard tasks now and it’s really frustrating. This is before you even count sleepless night and early rises.

I’m hoping they look after me when they are older after all this!

No use crying over spilt milk

Today didn’t got off to the best start, while making a bottle for my little boy at breakfast time I managed to drop it all over me,  the baby and floor! Very clever. After a full outfit change for us both and a clean floor (with full screaming baby now as he wanted his milk 5 minutes beforehand) I then pick up the bottle with the remaining milk in and proceed to drop it on the work bench! Honest I couldn’t make this stuff up! Stupid hand.

Thankfully that was the worst part of my day. I had loads of energy this morning and after his bottle a very content baby, so I decided to tackle the bedroom. I had a charity bag filled in no time and some of the baby stuff put aside to sell. We are hoping to sell and move house next year so I’m trying to clear out as much as i can, this is hard to do with 2 kids in the house who want to ‘help’ you. I’d even also managed to tidy up some boxes and strip the bed while i was in there. I was on a roll! as it was going great, I tidied the kitchen and living room, put the ironing away and hung the washing up! By lunchtime the house was looking very neat indeed.

My 4 yr old then returned from a sleepover at my mam’s house, team her and my little boy together and the house was trashed again!

It was cleaner than it was tho which is the main thing, and i have another bag to go to the charity shop. I will clear this house 1 bag at a time!

Tonight i am wiped, I think shower and early night is on the cards.